Ive got no time for anything anymoooooore!!
blaaaah xD
(though im in a good mood right now)


I just want to sleep, thats all..

Aff, I'm currently in the worst mood of all..

These last weeks have been awesome, my birthday was great! And also my brother got married not too long ago and he is currently on his honeymoon.
I've been happy almost nonstop for a long while, until this evening.
Probably it's just me being reallyreally tired and emo.

Today I tried to draw something good, but I just can't do it anymore. Atleast I cannot bring any (for me) real feeling to it! I need to find that feeling I used to have. It also feels like I'm loosing my self in this new world. It's like I've woken up from a dream, and now I'm all grownup and lacking all the emotions that used to come so easily and give me so much creativity.

I need to find out who I am, surround myself with that which defines who I am. I need to start dream again and to find my way to that window that showed me the world of inspiration and magic.

I'm not a teenager anymore, but I still want to dream on. Does it really have to end? It feels like everything in my life depends on me being in the present all the time. Forcing me into thinking about things that are currently happening in my life, in my social life, school life, family life... all that.

I know that this probably is a utterly meaningless and egocentric rant. But that doesn't change the fact that I feel the need to express myself to someone far far away from my reality. Even if it's just to the internet, and even though noone is reading this, maybe something with my "creative-life" will change for the better if I post this...magically.


//Avi

Hello ppl!

I've been gone for a long while (as usual). I don't know if anyone misses me D':
but to be honest, I'm way to busy with everything going on to have the slightest idea of what is happening with ANYTHING in my life right now!! It's craaazy!!
I go to school, do afterschool stuff, and come home at 9 pm, eat dinner, do homeworks, sleep aaand repeat.

Seriously! I hardly have time to sleep! I sleep during the weekends!! IT'S FREAKIN MADNESS!

Anyways, I've decided that after the summer I'm going to cut down on all the "afterschool-non-profit-organization-things" so that I can catch up with my life D: !

Don't misunderstand, I'm having a greaat time, learning loads of new stuff and I'm better on handeling stress (due to me being stressed all the time I now do things at once instead of procrastinating everything! So thats great.
But I NEED to atleast be able to breaaath!!

I've been doing alot of creative-drawing stuff too for all these "afterschool-non-profit-organi....." that I'll put up on devi when I get a chance. Though my elves and my anatomy training has suffered :'(




OhEmmGee.. I've written too much! Now noone is going to read this xD
It's okey, but this next thing I'm about to mention is VERY IMPORTANT:

March 19th is my b-day! huzzaaaah! 8D
Usually I get depressed because I get life-crisis very easily. So this year I'm trying to plan the whole day so that I'll be having funfunfun without the time to think about me getting old and other horrible stuff xD
Oh! And I'm expecting presuunts!
And knowing that theres an economical-crisis going on in the world you don't need to buy me stuff, but it would be fun if someone drew something for me! 8D

So the 10-15th January I went on skiing-vacation with some ppl from my school!

and it

was

AWESOME! xD



I had such a good time!! And I loved it all! It was like going to another world that was filled with snow! Without the worries and anxiety of reality <3
The only thing you did there was skiing, eating and sleeping xD !

and also, I fell whilst skiing aaall the time xD but believe it or not, that was fun too! Because it was kind of exciting, lawl, you never knew when you'd fall again.

I scraped my hand, hurt my thumb, hurt my cheek, my knees, a couple of toes on my left foot etcetc 8D
The most of it is allright now, except my thumb

but oh weells!



another thing that happened is that I've got a new favourite song!!

"Jackie Jackson" by Franz Ferdinand xD it's soo funny!! so go and youtube it and listen to the lyrics lawl


all for me this time :q

babye sweeties! <3

Huzzah! Journal update!! \o/

Life is busy at always got tests and shit comin up xD but I don't want to talk about that!!!

This weekend I went on a trip with my choir to an island called "Åland". The island is positioned between Sweden and Finland, but it lies in finnish water xD

Anywho, we lived in a boarding house from friday evening to sunday morning and I had such a good time!! So much fun!! Even though I was tired to death... xD
On friday evening we were just hanging in a big room with the choir just doing nothing :3 And I was ofc one of the last to go to bed >_< was up til 3 am.
The saturday started with singing singing singing, from 9 am to.. sometime late.. I think it was 4 pm, but not completely sure. Anywhoo! The evening we had dinner while singing alot of fun songs. After dinner I went to the sauna!! huzzah!!! The sauna was about 200 metres or something from the shore (yup! we lived near the water xD) So, even thought it was cold, me and several others went and took a couple of dips in the water and hurried back into the warmth of the sauna xD very fun :3
That night ended quite late also, and the day after we sang a little and then walked back to the harbor were whe boarded a ship that would take us back to Sweden! hurrah! \o/



Though, due to many high waves and a strong deep sea currents, the ship couldn't get into the harbor in Sweden ... so we were to sea and waited for a better weather for 5 hours!! xD lawl

Also, because people on the ship were being bored, the crew gave everyone free food and drinks xD and also my choir were allowed up on stage twice to sing (for about 15 mins each time xD)

yupyup..
So that day was fun, though it didn't really bother me that very much because the only thing waiting for me at home was homework >_<
on the other hand, now I'm far behind on stoopid homework

blah.. gtg T_T